And it scares me.
Ever get weak knees?
Well, I got ’em.
Ever heard of weak feet?
Me neither.
I got those too.
I’m the sun of this physical disaster.
You see, I’ve felt pretty.
I’ve felt beauty.
I’ve felt gorgeous breathing upon my ear.
I’ve felt sight for years and years.
Standards only take seconds to begin yet last lifetimes.
Did you see what it looked like?
You would understand.
I’ve had my moments.
Oh, this is the time!
A dangerous time!
Of best and wonderful.
Too much time to think about one.
With caution signs alerting the driver of a chemical explosion up above.
It rains, pours, upon my vehicle.
But nothing is ending the collapse.
And the thoughts are all scattered.
But since when did selfish deserve organization?
Did I mention I’ve felt gorgeous breathe upon my ear?
As well as hot kissing up my neck?
And voluptious guide its hands to places once forbidden?
All for a shake of the hand. A pat on the back.
But our voices are never heard.
My the mind is mighty.
“The” is gone.
You would’ve died for a taste.
I killed for that handshake.
I’ll be king of hidden potential.
I looked so good from afar…
But baby, I always look good in the mirror.
Remember.
The second you think you may take your hand and grab whatever it is you like, is the second before you are found not worthy enough to have any of it.
Remember.
And I’ll go to sleep without an imaginary kiss,
From the imaginary lips,
Of someone who doesn’t exist.
For the first time in a long one I struggle to envision a face next to mine.
The face of a girl so wanderingly desired to think about before I succumb to slumber.
The portrait of a love to dream to,
while she sleeps soundly in another place.
Someone whose presence I will wish to be laying next to.
And whoever she may be will never know the thoughts of her, side by side with me, that I shut my eyes to.
But I will.
And whenever the night comes,
that I can finally kiss you, I will then
arise in the morning,
and kiss you once again.
I swear the clouds looked a little different with that light shining through it.
It just had to get those beams out high enough where we could see them.
Maybe to try and show us something.
Scattered and chaotic they looked.
Maybe to try and tell us something.
But don’t fright love.
It is only a matter of time before order is restored to the clouds, the skies, our life.
It’s dark outside.
So take me inside and underground.
Show me something new.
The world’s full of the riches that we are all fighting for.
I can’t wait to see them.
Show me the underground lights.
I have never been.
Take my hand and show me something I’ve never seen.
Warm me up in this cold bed,
But keep the table lamp on.
I want to see your face in the pale light reflected on the wall.
And ever since that melody when I realized my jazz.
I saw and felt all that I wanted to see and breathe.
And it was the expression of my heart.
Harmonic freedom,
But I could see it when I closed my eyes.
It came in chaos and in peace.
Noise.
Animation.
Nonsense.
Cities.
Dirty electricity.
Fog and fire places.
Bricks And Castles.
Pleasing acceleration.
When all is right.
Lights.
Night.
Stars.
Steering wheels and my foot on the pedal that never let go.
Before the sun begins to sleep.
Early morning, and the reverb, and ever increasing volume and the smooth fall from space.
Space shuttles.
Moons and planets.
Sometimes you have to forget to remember.
And everytime I hear this jazz, my love.
When I intake these scents!
And I close my eyes and see the lights of the city from my balcony of my skyscraper apartment.
I look up to see the sky. A silent mirror. The stars a reflection of the lights below them.
Brilliance sweetie, brilliance.
And I could settle for a street lamp.
But I never thought to see this accompanied.
I always wished for presence.
But could never find one.
And I think, I’d love to go there, and I will not go alone.
I love you and you will come with me//
Sleep in love.jazz.harmony we will.
Harmony. I’ve heard that word all my life but today I realized what it means.
Kind of like sun-roofs to the people at the bus stop.
Sort of like kissing someone new in front of your old.
It’s something so meaningless.
Made to cover up what’s underneath,
But they hide more than just bodyparts.
And it’s as if this writing is comparable to it.
“To express,” they claim.
Son, I’ll show expression.
It’s a little story about yourself.
You can’t buy it
Or see it in patterns.
The patterns are seen everywhere but they change in a similar pattern.
Get it?
Stolen from others you simply express them.
Stolen from factories you leave them behind to bleed.
Show me a man whose sunglasses earned him a friend and I’ll show you a man who never had any soul.
And I could fill these pages up with words of your description.
They would speak of the beauty you possess,
Gleaming from your mouth, your eyes.
And I could sit here on this Pasadena hill with you and look upon the city lights,
while we indulge in the jazz inspired melodies that play through the night.
There’s something quite warm about this summer night… and sweetie, it’s not the weather.
And since honesty seems to be the tone I cannot lie of how you’ve taken me by surprise.
I could stare into your eyes and not look away until you do.
I still wouldn’t though.
You absolutely amaze me.
Simply, because I don’t have to say a word to know that you know.
With a quick steal of your stare, I know that you know.
With the way you hate to say goodbye.
And I feel like I’m cheating.
Looking ahead a bit.
Glancing over the cliffside.
I can see your grace. Your absolute presence.
And I’m simply lucky to see how much beauty one person can have.
It’s almost as beautiful to watch.
And that smile never dies. That smile is contagious.
And I crumbled under “Reason and rational.”
But things should be dealt without logic.
For logic provides questions but hearts provide answers.
And I apologize for kick starting the whirlwind.
I never meant to confuse.
This King of Hearts was simply frightened.
Could I provide?
But what would you do if you found a golden egg?
…away from its mother?
You’d do everything to make sure it got home safely.
But I am your home.
And it doesn’t matter how fast it took you…
Just how you got home.
Safe and sound. Safe and sound.
Words are simply words.
Response is everything.
Trust your protection. Trust in the absence of all doubt.
Trust that I am present.
You see, they’re always going to find ways to keep us down.
As if we must put on some show to all those who’d rather see us frown.
It’s us against the world.
You are safe in these hands and…
Scratch through the surface.
Tell me what you find.
I never did give the most popular answer.
I’m great with my words but stutter through pressure.
Honesty seems only existant in ourselves.
But there is nothing but sincerity in my cold words.
I have not but one lie in my millions of truths.
To say that I am anything but scared would be wrong.
Scared of what you are and how good you can be.
We’re on 2 different ships headed to two neighboring cities.
Mine has been flooded and lit up to light the night.
Yours is just a small town ready to grow.
I’ve been slowly rebuilding as you are simply beginning to build.
But one day our lands will merge to create the greatest city you could ever see.
With the tallest buildings and the brightest lights.
Just like we wanted. Just like we planned.
I saw it from day 1,
but we haven’t been around for long.
And it scares me that this young
we could possibly find our one.
And I could lay here and listen to it for hours as it blows on the outside.
It’s the clearest it’s been in months.
You can see the dark blue hue sleeping across the top of the mountain.
The bold horizon of the city.
I know that you don’t miss it but the wind has just reached me.
I would’ve stolen it if I could’ve.
It’s great to hear the things that don’t matter being tossed around the streets.
Getting knocked over.
Reminders of all that does matter to me.
Remember the new outlook to kill the darkest of days?
And the beauty you couldn’t help but see in everything?
It’s a challenge to even come up with words to imitate such life and motion.
Well, you can’t remember because it was all inside of me… and still is.
Only I think one can relate.
I must’ve missed the day from when the banana’s turned ripe,
and this windy night,
and fell in love.
I am taken back.
To a time when all that existed was loud nights, rainy weather and winding roads.
Where only one thing mattered.
Where we went to get away.
Where it only took one road to get there.
And this song on the radio.
These songs on our radio.
To find ourselves and everything we had never seen before.
And sweetie I kissed you in this foggy weather.
We discovered this city.
Just me and you.
From the clothes on our backs to our shows on television.
Just to represent the times.
When nothing meant the world.
Our time.